Where did Every one go?

Monday started with no blues and with full of life. No morning tensions at home. Reached office on time ;-) and started work. EVerything seemed so perfect. But then..now a days..getting into off mood is the easiest thing that occurs so naturally to me. So evening dont know what triggered my mood off..but the minute I was in a bad mood, I attracted things which could spoil my mood even worse.

So suddenly in the evening..i felt desperately lonely...needed a shoulder to cry on..and ofcourse didnt want to hear any advises. And then I thought I will call home..My home number..guess my daughter did not keep the receiver properly so not reachable. Then I called my college friends. .you dont have to keep in touch with them but still can catch up with good old times whenever you call them. For a change..everyones number I had..and every ones mobile was ringing..no one picked up...Whats wrong..

Then I called up my uncle..thinking may be i could talk to him to change my mood..but same story...phone ringing no one picking up..

Finally I called up my cousin....who was very busy and asked me to call tomorrow..And after I disconnected I felt very lonely..but by then I reached home.

And when I entered there my princess..she was standing and telling some story to her aunty :-). She was holding a small dog (ofcourse toy..she is like me..in getting scared of dogs and cats) and telling her aunty..Aunty you mix milk for the doggy..what the dog name i kept.i forgot..ya ya timmy..you mix milk put three full spoons of pediasure okay..mix properly okay otherwise timmy will not drink...and then seeing the expression of her aunty...she turned back to see me..and came running and gave a hug ammmmma...you are home..see ammma..timmy not drinking milk..what do now? Seeing her face full of innocence...and the way a three year old speaks..it just filled the heart with happiness..

So what did I say..mood off..who got mood off...

By the way..where did everyone go..Was it some earth hour or something yesterday that everyone decided not to pick up their call????!!!!

I AM TIRED..

Someone Asked..Hey Are You Ok?
And I replied..Yes I am OK. Just TIRED..little bit...

So What I meant is..I am
Torn apart,Insecured,Really Faking my smile,Extremely Sad and Drowning in my own tears..

And if you ask me Why...I would reply..I really dont know.

Actually physical activities make you tired but then the recovery from that tiredness could just be a good rest..a good sleep..you wake up and you are perfectly fine and even active..

But its the state of our mind which keeps us active or tired. When you do something you really love to do..or enjoy doing it with people whom you love to be with...then any kind of activity may never make you tired.

But at the sametime if you are stressed out..I dont know..how all kinds of problems gets a hint that one person is stressed out , so lets go visit him and reaches us as quick as possible and wait in queue to say a hello to us. And it adds more stress to decide which one of the problems to address first.

Sometimes we always keep expecting more from some people in our lives probably because we also would do them more. Sometimes certain situations comes up which puts you in a totally helpless state and all you can give the other person is some excuse. Sometimes in life we dont know what is the right thing to do and end up doing something which might lead to a big change.

Whenver we do any plan using our brain..especially in my case with the limited access I have with my brain..we tend to forget to have a mitigation plan because of the interupption or risk to our plan caused by our heart.

Wow.How can someone blabber so much early in the morning...

Well Like I said..I AM TIRED..really...

At some point of time when you are very very tired..probably it might lead to a state of mind where you dont care about anything..anyone..and start losing your cool and start yelling at people for no reason..which I just did... Thankfully got back to my senses in few minutes...and had the courage to call that person back and tell sorry too.

So well..now am in a great mood..and you can talk to me at your own risk :-).